Finding a home
by Walker56
Summary: She has a mission, Finding somewhere safe, finding a group, finding a home. A Daryl/OC story, T rated.
1. Chapter 1

_I crouched there motionless. Froze in fear. The guns went off in every direction, people beside me fell coughing and gurgling blood. An explosion boomed and threw me aside. I remained unscathed but I turned my head to see my sergeant crawling legless towards me. His face was hanging on by a thread and the blood, the blood was everywhere. He cried out to me- to help but how could I. He used up any energy he could muster and collapses gently whispering someone's name. I crawled over holding my gun ready in case. _

_"Tell my..." He coughed violently spewing blood over me, I couldn't move only hold his hand in reassurance that everything would be okay though we both knew it wouldn't. "My wife, I've loved ever since I lay... Eyes on..." I could predict what he said next but he wasn't there to finish instead he left me alone in the dusty winds of our camp. The rest was a blur, tears breached the dam in my eyes and I could feel the arms of someone wrap round me dragging me away. _

I can't carry on like this. The nightmares haunt day and night, there's no stopping them. As these monsters roam the earth punishing us for our sins. I've done things before this world I wish I never had to but I did and there's no going back now. Live and accept it or rejected it and die slowly. I knew I had to kill people when I signed up, it's the army. The amount though was kept in a thick mist. I guess it prepared me for this dark twisted world yet I pray I never had to.

I've seen true fear, at gunpoint. Terrorist with faces scared of us, the good guys. Their expression left a mark on me, one that can't be removed, and one that haunts me every night I close my eyes, if I do. The undead like to keep me awake with their stomach churning moans and the threat of getting bitten and turning to one of them. I've seen herds consisting of hundreds maybe thousands, just walking forward, no destination just walking. At that time with an old group we were terrified of a twig snapping. Now the rest of that group is gone. Just gone… They ran away and never returned. I guess they could be alive somewhere, found sanctuary living happy and safe but on the other hand they could just be another freak destined to wander this lonely earth, searching for something to chew on.

Finding another group is well… difficult. You either run into a psychopathic killer who enjoys you slow painful death or no one. It's a tough choice. I just want to find somewhere fortified, strong and friendly but apparently that's way too much to ask nowadays. You have to choose one of the listed which isn't always easy. Fortified- it could have dangerous and I mean dangerous people inside. I've had a couple of run-ins with these people and I don't want to experience that ever again. Strong- they're already a unit and adding another would wreck their system, you're not wanted. And finally Friendly- They could let in any one including these dangerous folks. The group self-destructs and BAM! You're alone again. I just want to find somewhere with the perfect mix, and I guess that drives me and most people left on. Finding somewhere safe, finding a group, finding a home.


	2. Chapter 2

_"Nat! Nat come on, wake up wake up please." I heard a demanding desperate voice my ear. My eyes peeled open slowly to reveal a familiar face. My breath was laboured and quick; I felt a searing pain come from my leg. As I looked down I saw the familiar face tending to what wound I had endured. It felt and looked like a gunshot. Everything slowly dawned on me as I lay on a rough, cold floor in an orange candle light room. We'd been attack and lots died. Images flashed through my mind of the broken, torn victims of the bombs that went off. Legless, limbless, lifeless. Their blood-curdling cries hit me in the core and making me weep like a baby yearning for its mother. They cried for their mothers to comfort them, reverting back to the young innocent children they once were. Some called for their wives and husbands, screaming their love for them as if they'd hear, as if they knew their pain at that moment but they didn't. Back home they didn't know what we had to see, what we had to carry out. Completely oblivious to the horrors of war. I understand we signed up for this but no one could prepare us for this, to see our friends, our comrades blown to pieces right in front of you. _

Another night in and out of sleep, another night of trying to tell myself it's not real. I could feel the bags hanging from my once bright eyes. They pulled me down to the cold, concrete floor I'd been sleeping on for a couple of nights now. I had a plan, which I believed was good, I would hit a prison nearby. There'd be food, weapons and if I wanted somewhere to stay. A prison is ideal, fences that were built to keep people in. It'd surely keep all the monsters out.

I holstered my gun, ready to set out on a journey that could supply a little dash of hope that I needed. It was a short walk from where I was staying for those two days, an hour at most. I felt excited which is strange but I truly did. The prospect of something new, something good could come of it. Maybe a group lived there and they'd let me in with open arms. This spur of excitement propelled me quicker through the undergrowth, through the streams, through the few undead I encountered on my way.

I stumbled out of the forest. It was better than I could ever dream. I saw children running around, playing. People just milled around completely carefree. I saw a little farm, with pigs and a horse. A barbeque looked as if it was going and the sounds of laughter filled the air, louder than the moans of the undead, rattling the fences. This was it. This was the place. I breathed in forcing back the tears of happiness as I approached the gate cautiously. There's no need to get stupid now. The gate looked fashioned from bits and bobs round the place but it was effective keeping out the undead.

I heard a yell, southern drawl, definitely redneck. I was unsure if it was directed at me but I stood my ground, just outside the gate. I waited for the gate to open. Many bodies scuttled around aiming weapons at me as the slowly opened it. With a sigh of relief I stepped in.

"Weapons on the ground!" I recognised the southern drawl, someone from the tower that spotted me I think. I complied and lay down a handgun, shotgun and a buck knife. I saw the darting looks between them. They looked strong from first appearances. One man stepped forth, crossbow slung over his shoulder, red rag drooping out his pocket and mud that covered the majority of his face.

"Three questions." I nodded, ready for the questions. I drew a deep lingering breath to steady my nerves. I couldn't go back out there, I just couldn't.

"How many walkers you killed?" The man held an unreadable face. His eyes moved up and down my body, watching me like a predator on prey.

"I've killed enough to be capable." His eyes narrowed, I hope I didn't say the wrong thing but the blackened blood that coated my clothes was sure an indicator. He shuffled on his feet while all his comrades still circled round me, weapons raised.

"How many people you kill?" I felt my eyes widen, my breath quicken and my palms became sweaty. Once again I took another deep breath to steady my nerves.

"Six." I saw their reaction, a subtle gasp, tightening of the weapon. I understood it's a lot of people to kill single handily but I had reasons, perfectly reasonable reasons. The man's eyes were looking in disbelief, almost unsure of what to make of it.

"Final question. Why?" I knew I had to answer this question otherwise they'd think I'm a twisted sicko who kills for fun and I am not that.

"They were turning into monsters." I didn't lie but I shielded the truth slightly. They were becoming monsters, every meaning of the word. I prayed they'd take it literally as in the undead. He nodded curtly and extended his hand.

"Daryl, and you?" I took his hand and shook it firmly.

"Nat."


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thanks for the reviews, follows and favourite. Disclaimer I don't own anything apart from my OC.**_

_"Come on please Nat, come on please." Someone begged and begged for my conscious return, I fought hard against the darkness that overcame me but it hurt to move my eyes, it ached to move anything. My eyes awoke again and that same familiar face hovered over my body. Shadows bounced off the walls in the moonlight that crept through the boarded windows. He snapped his head round checking every shadow that passed the walls._

_"Where...where are we?" I mumbled still regaining consciousness. He was clearly panicked and I sure as hell would be if I knew what was going on. _

_"Village little out of our camp, they stormed it. Everyone...everyone." He stuttered at the end, reliving every little detail. I put my hand gently on his forearm and smiled softly which he returned a shakier nervous smile but nevertheless a smile. _

_"We can't move, they've surrounded the village, and... And they will search every building won't they, they will we are dead if they do, you can't move either, we're so screwed." He whimpered. He was cracking under the pressure, it was visibly showing. We have to be strong in times like this. I sat up against the wall wincing at my wound. _

_"We can get outta here, it's just going to take some time and strength. You hear me?" My words seemed to provide little but much needed comfort to the young man. He nodded understanding what needed to be done. He breathed in and out, regaining any composure he had left. The choppers above whirred and jeep engines roared, more were arriving here and we were in the dark. We had little vision to what was going on out there so formulating a plan would be difficult. We didn't have much choice. _

I knew I should feel safe within the walls of cell block B but I didn't, not yet anyway. I still woke traumatised from a nightmare in the darkened cell. I just hoped I didn't scream the place down or flood the cells with my tears. I tried to muffle my cries of pain into the pillow I'd been given but people still heard them and someone came in at one point to ask if I was okay to which I replied "yeah".

I rose from my cell, bright eyed and brushy tailed as I lurched around to the smell of food. It came from outside and it smelt meaty and delicious. I suddenly felt awake and energized. My diet for the past year or so has mostly consisted of anything scrap I could find whether it be rotten fruit or canned food. I would eat anything I had to just to get by. That seemed to be changing and I liked it. I walked over to the barbeque I'd spotted from beyond the gates where a mousy woman stood behind tending to the grilling meat. I eyed the slabs of meat like a lion to a gazelle. My stomach grumbling egging me on to get some down me.

"Hey, you want a plate?" she offered with a sweet, comforting smile on the side.

"Yeah, please. What meat is this if you don't mind me asking?" I queried just as she was plating it up on a paper plate like one you'd use at parties.

"Deer, caught by Daryl, who I believe you've met." A hot plate of succulent venison, it almost felt as if I wasn't even in an apocalypse. It felt normal, too normal. She handed over a heavenly smelling plate to me. I couldn't wait to start, my stomach growled louder and louder, much to my embarrassment.

"Thanks for cooking it…" I paused realised I didn't know her name. I'd forgot my manners at the gate.

"Carol." She said sweetly, turning over more slabs of meat.

"Well thanks and give my appreciation to the hunter." I chimed "Oh I'm Nat by the way." I began walking off to sit down and enjoy my meal when Carol called me back.

"Nat, you can tell him yourself, he's over there." She handed the apron and cooking utensils to a younger looking boy probably around 15 or 16. He gladly took them and continued the job at hand. I nodded I walked off in the hunters direction. He was chatting with white haired and bearded man. He seemed to have a prosthetics leg, I was impressed with the place. I strode over to express my thanks, I stood beside him, waiting for him to acknowledge my presence. I saw the white haired man eye me from the corner of his and I heard him trying to end the conversation.

"Seems you have someone here to talk Daryl." With that he hobbled away over to the grill grabbing a plate. Daryl towered over me in every sense. His arms looked twice the size of mine and my height only reached the tip of his nose. He remained quiet until I spoke my piece.

"I, um just wanted to say thanks for catching this deer and for letting me in. I appreciate it." I yammered on. His expression didn't change, not a muscle, nothing. He just stared into my eyes stiffly listening to my words.

"It's nuthin." He shook it off and began walking away. I stood perplexed at the lack of anything he showed. He just walked off after I plucked up the courage to share my thanks with him and he says it's nothing and walks off.

"No it is, I would've died out there if you didn't let me in." I trotted over in front of him, much to his surprise. His eyes rolled and he tried to move out the way, moving me slightly with his arm. I scoffed and strode in the opposite direction to him. Well I had a choice to steer clear of him which I intended to do.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Sorry I didn't put up a chapter for two days I had been away.**_

_After much consideration, we decided to play it very safe, there was no point killing ourselves but we knew the risk. There's always been that and always will be. The door stood tall and intimidating. We crouched at the door just about to go out. I stopped him from going out the door with my arm, he looked terrified. Eyes wide and hands trembling. _

_"Thanks, for saving my ass before." I admitted with confidence; if this was my final battle then may as well say something nice. _

_"Nothing you wouldn't do." He brushed it off easily, as if it was nothing. It was something, he saved me and I saw people fleeing in every direction. He stopped and took me away from the firing, the explosion and all the death and I'm eternally grateful for that. He deserves to get out of this without a scratch, I knew that wouldn't be the case but we can dream. _

_"Yeah but you're new and it's hard in these situations to keep a level head, you're brave. Remember that." I smiled slightly before gently prying the door open. Nothing seemed out the ordinary. I motioned for him to be quiet as I exited the room, I limped slightly but it wasn't anything I couldn't handle, I've been shot before and got out of there fine and kicking. I didn't want to make a noise too noticeable so I held my knife tight and limped on. I winced at every step but soldier on right? _

Once again a pretty sleepless night. I asked if I could go on watch but they had already filled the position. Though disappointed, I just laid on my bed, sinking into the mattress, which I still haven't got used to. It felt almost normal apart from the barred windows and doors and grey concrete walls. I'd regularly just lay in my bed alone with my thoughts. I never had company over so my mind was my only form of human interaction, which is sad really. I guess this was all I had left of my past self, looking up to the ceiling with my mind wandering from place to place at night. I'm glad I can hold onto that one thing. Even though it may seem insignificant to anyone else, to me it was all I had left.

I could feel the bags under my eyes but despite that I felt pretty good and awake. I got my breakfast from Carol who I nodded politely at, then ate it quickly as I wanted to get in on a run going out today. Over the few days I'd been here I felt ready and rested to actual start doing something for them. I saw several people loading some weapons and bags into the boot of a rather clean car. I jaunted over to the car where some people where crowding round deciding a plan of action.

"Excuse me!" I coughed, their chatter silenced and they all turned to face me including Daryl. He narrowed his eyes at me and readjusted his crossbow on his broad shoulders.

"Let me guess you want to go." A young Asian man quipped, I nodded confidently. He turned and looked at Daryl and he shrugged in reply.

"Get your things, meet us at the gate in 10." Daryl grunted in a deep, low tone.

I jogged away to grab my gun and buck knife. I reached my cell and fished around for them. They were hiding in the safe place I put them but couldn't actually remember where that was which was under my bed. Good job Nat! I almost sprinted out still trying to swing my jacket on. I reached there just in the nick of time as they were revving their engines. I leaped into the car ready to go.

"I'm Glenn, this is Michonne, Bob and Zach." They all chanted hello together as if a ritual.

"I'm Nat, short for Natalie." I uttered quietly still unsure of these people. I sat in-between Zach and Michonne. Zach had a stupid smile on his face the whole way but Michonne was quieter and more reserved. She looked like a warrior depicted in books, she was impressive.

"So what did you do before this Nat?" My head whipped round to Zach who faced me smirking.

"Army." I stated simply, he nodded impressed as did the others in the car. It was only chit-chat from then on but they seemed like good people. Loyal when you got on the good side of them but dangerous and lethal when on the wrong.

Daryl swerved his bike into a parking lot in front of a local big spot supermarket. Chain link fences surrounded it with green army tents inside. I clutched my gun unsure of what was behind the fences. I was given a bag to put anything useful inside and some clips for my gun. I thanked them and went to stand by the gate along with Daryl and Michonne who were peeking through the gate.

"What you think is in there?" Daryl examined the area intently with his hunter eye. I carefully inspected the tents which looked very similar to the ones we had at my old camp.

"It looks like a deserted refugee camp, army probably set it up. See the tents we had them at our old camp." I theorised, they both nodded agreeing. I felt too quiet for a refugee camp. Even if they died they would have come back and I'd imagine there would be a few walkers around. The others joined us and began cutting through the fence. Blackened blood tipped the edges, it didn't look very recent.

"Something's wrong." I breathed, the others walked through weapons raised.

"There's always something wrong, you get used to it." Daryl grumbled as he continued through the fence. We stuck in formation eyeing the desolate tents and glimpsed inside one and a decomposing body lay inside with a couple others. Their green, mouldy skin and long shut eyes assured me they weren't coming back.

The entrance was there but we waited to see if any undead were inside, or walkers as the prison calls them. Bob stood outside bloodied crowbar raised along with Michonne sword at the ready. Daryl banged on the window and whistled a high pitched tune. He told us to wait a minute, give the walkers time to come out of the dark. Then Zach began to speak.

"Lemme guess, you were a prison guard before this." Daryl swung his head round and nodded. Zach looked in disbelief.

"Seriously?" He still wasn't sure while Daryl seemed to smirk to himself. I leaned against the wall waiting to go in fiddling with my buck knife which was tucked into my belt. Zach scoffed as a walker threw itself against the window. Bob opened the door smashed its brains in. They all began walking in but I saw something. It was the bottom half of someone, guts poured out onto the gravelled road and blood seemed to have dried. I took one last looked and marched on into dingy big spot, hoping that I wasn't right.


	5. Chapter 5

_It was quiet, all I could hear was the heavy footsteps of our group. I gathered some cans of food which I was lucky to find. I grab batteries and other useful things. It was a goldmine to anyone nowadays. It was then it began. A sudden thud echoed through the big spot. I rushed over to see what the commotion was about. Bob seemed stuck under a heavy wooden shelf. Bottles of wine crashed on the ground and shattered into millions of pieces. The wine woke the floor like blood. Some tried to pull it up and we nearly did until, it fell hanging for its entrails from the ceiling. Still gnashing away at us. We stood frozen, no muscle moved. It was then they rained from the ceiling some exploding upon impact and others just pushed themselves up and lurched over to us.__  
__"GET BOB OUT OF HERE NOW!" Daryl nearly screamed at us who just stood bewildered by the storm that was raging on. It suddenly clicked and we followed like sheep heaving this shelf off, we had to stop. We splintered and ran in opposite directions around the big spot. My gun raised as I heard the groaning get louder and louder. One came round then another and another till there was six all coming to get coming to punish me. I fired and of course I hit my target, it was second nature now. I ran in the opposite direction they were coming from. I got blocked again another five came from that direction. I couldn't get out so I screamed out praying for help to arrive. Then almost like a star in the dark night sky I saw a opening and I pushed and squeezed my way through killing some walkers on the way. I panted heavily then I remembered bob.__  
_

_"BOB!" I screeched hoping he'd reply which he did.__  
__"NAT OVER HERE!" He was still caught under the shelf of wine. A walker with its scalp peeling was pushing its way towards him until I ceased its movements. Zach came running too and helped me move it off. Bob squirmed free just. The others returned, sweating and covered in a splash of walker blood. They panted for a moment regaining any energy they had to carry on._

_"NOOOOO!" Zach wailed as he was pulled to the floor by a hidden walker. I was about to pull him up as the walker pulled a chunk out of his neck. He gurgled and choked, like at my old camp, like the people at my old camp. My mind told me go, my body persisted to stay. I just stared down at the boy being torn apart, I heard the cracking and saw the ceiling falling apart but I still couldn't move._

_"NAT COME ON!" I heard daryl shout I wanted to go but I couldn't move. Then out of nowhere I was being pulled away from the memories of that camp._

_Daryl dropped me on the floor. The warmed gravel scrapped my hands and I picked out all he little stones from my hands, carefully and intently. I saw daryl pace up and down holding onto the bridge of his nose.__  
__"What was that?!" He snapped getting right in my face. I could smell the dirt and sweat on him. It smelt like the woods. I'd like to take my dog on walks in the woods.__  
__"I don't know, I guess I froze." I bowed my head ashamed pushing about the stones on the ground.__  
__"You could've endangered the whole groups life!" I roared like a lion and snarled like one too bearing his teeth trying to scare me.__  
__"Don't you think I know that?" I hissed, pushing myself up from the ground, standing up strong ready to defend myself.__  
__"I'm not sure, from what I saw no!" He barked at me, flailing his arms around. He paced up and down while the others watched.__  
__"You don't know what I've seen, what I've had to do and I guess that dug it up a little. Sorry." I hissed lowly.__  
__"We've all seen shit we wish we hadn't but you don't see me stood under a collapsing ceiling." I huffed out of frustration, I couldn't believe it. I couldn't help it. It just happened and the experiencing and sounds in there honed in on memories that I only dream of wishing to forget. I live with them but never forget them and sometimes they catch up to me and pull me down.__  
__"You know what screw you Daryl! You don't get it and I ain't going to explain it to you." With that I stormed away only to pull back may a rough hand. I turned fuming and eyes watering.__  
__"I need to know you're a team player and whatever this was won't happen again." He spoke calmer and more collected but still asserted his authority over me.__  
__"Sure." I whispered still with fumes pouring from my ears and went on my way to the car.__  
_

I woke, sweat dripping from my forehead, I trembled with fear. It shook me to my core, I'd never felt this before. That wasn't a normal nightmare, it was different from the one I have every night. I'm not sure if I could interpret that in a good way or a bad way. My old demons where disappearing but new ones were coming out the dark and they were worse, evolved to cause as much pain as they could. They learnt from before, their weaknesses becoming strengths and I am scared of what they could become and what it'd make me._  
_


	6. Chapter 6

_**I'd like to thank Juliaxxe for their kind review, I love getting reviews especially lovely ones like that. Sorry I haven't been able to update for a while I've had to focus on exams and stuff and that may continue for a bit so here's a chapter in the meantime. Enjoy!**_

"BANG!" I moaned rolling over onto my side. Whoever made that sound would pay. I was shattered and now I was in a safe place I would like to sleep even if nightmares filled them.  
"BANG!" Two, sounded like gunfire. I pushed myself up wiping away the sleep from my eyes. I holstered my gun and knife and crept out the cell.  
"BANG, BANG!" Something was happening and it wasn't good. I ran through the winding corridors towards the sound, heroically to prove I am a team player.  
"BANG!" There was the chaos, people screaming, running away. Walkers drooled thickened blood of their victims. Some chewed on shoulders of those who fell to the ground.  
"BANG!" Those who escaped locked themselves in cells watching as others fell and the walkers clawed at them through the bars.  
"BANG, BANG, BANG!" I shot three walkers down with deadly accuracy. Their numbers dwindle we turned out on top. Gunfire ceased as did the massacre. I could hear the tears falling and crashing down on the stained floor. I could hear the mourning women and children as the gathered round dying husbands who protected them throughout this world. I. Bowed my head out of respect but I didn't feel sad. I felt sorry for the people that grieved round the dying but not sad.

"Nat!" Amongst the sobbing a male voice shouted but I couldn't distinguish it. Then out of the crowd stepped Daryl hollering me over. We nodded a greeting and I followed him to the perch. We joined a small group of blood covered men peering into an obscured cell. Blood puddled just in front of their heavy boots. I peeked through their shoulders to see Patrick the boy who was serving the venison the other day.  
"What happened here?" I gasped. I hadn't seen walkers like this. Blood coming from the eyes, streaking down their faces like art.  
"He wasn't bitten, he died last night." Stated doctor S. "See the blood, I think it's a hypoglycaemia. They choked on their own blood…. Imagine your body is a soda can and you're shook up. Except the top is your eyes, mouths and ears." Doctor S continued. Our small group eyed each other nervously. I could see one thought was on our minds. 'Is it contagious?'  
"So it's a bad flu. Does that mean it's contagious?" I chimed in.  
"Yeah, we don't know if it's contagious but I wouldn't say it isn't. We should quarantine this area and those exposed shouldn't mix." He stated clearly. Rick got the message as did Hershel.  
"All of us, we've been exposed to it?" Daryl asked and Doctor S nodded simply. Daryl sighed deeply. We got cut off by a groaning from the adjacent cell.  
"I got it." I called and I headed over pulled the son of bitch by the collar and made sure it wasn't going to call out again. I huffed a breath and wipe the remnants of the walker on my trouser leg, it could be washed. I re-joined the group whom where muttering amongst themselves.  
"Nat, if it's not too much, I'd like you to help with this situation." Hershel said hobbling round to face me. Daryl's face was stern and unchanged as was Rick's.  
"Why? You don't know me. I just got here." I said defensively whilst subconsciously backing off slightly. Hershel took note of my reaction.  
"You heard the gunshots and came running here without a thought. Don't you think that deserves some recognition?" Old man Hershel had a way with words. It was like a lullaby that brought me into a calm collected state. He made me feel confident in myself even though I knew I was a terrible person. He had a skill, though not as regarded in today's world.  
"Nothing they wouldn't have done." I took another step back. Though I was calmed I didn't enjoy having nice things said to me. It felt wrong and uncomfortable. All I wanted to do was squirm away from the trapping words he offered but I couldn't I had to stay.  
"Exactly, dear." I pondered for a brief moment realising I helped as they did, even If I got hurt I'd still run into danger for these people. I didn't care so much on the talking side and emotional crap but even being here for a few days I could feel this place was worth keeping, worth the risk. Sometimes you just got to roll the dice and on this occasion I had. I knew few places existed that seemed so honest because I've seen places like this that had a twisted side behind them, places that'd you'd walk into and only escape if you were a rotting corpse. I could read people and they seemed good, not clean I knew they'd seen some messed up stuff and had to do things they wished they never had to as we all have but their morals were there which remained strong. I saw it in all the people here as soon as I stepped foot into this prison. They knew this place was worth keeping and all would fight to the bitter end to keep it.

"I'll help." I said with conviction. "What do you need?" I was looking for orders, things to do to keep me busy and moving. It was my natural state to be given ordered and I was where I was most comfortable.  
"We need graves, a lot of them. You can help Daryl dig. You both wear masks, I mean it." I nodded and headed outside to begin the hard day ahead. I saw a shovel leaning against the wall so I took it in my hand and strode over to the makeshift grave yard where crosses fashioned out of twine and sticks lay still. It felt eerie and weird to me. The graves thing was dropped out of my conscious when I first lost someone I cared about in this world. I knew it was never going to be the same and up until now it hadn't. They had created something normal, something vaguely like before.

I dug the shovel deep into the parched ground. I shovelled the dirt over my shoulder into a small forming pile. One after another I fell into a stride and I left this world to another.

_We kept to the darkness and out of the spotlights. The terrorists were bashing in doors left, right and centre. Pulling out sleepy families from their slumber. Shots were fired and I could hear the cries of mothers and fathers. I don't understand how you could live with yourself after killing a young boy or girl in front of their family, it was sick and twisted. I had my back covered and we advanced forth, successfully until we reached the edge of the village. They surrounded it entirely. The terrorists had lined up men from the village in a line. Torches lit them up like a fire. The terrorist stood uneasy, shifting from foot to foot. From what I could see one received orders and waved the machine gunners off. The village men collapsed into a mute mass. _

I didn't break until sweat splashed against the dry ground, I swear I could hear I sizzle. One grave done for the deceased, another and another and another and another to do. Daryl appeared out the corner of my eye beside me, I didn't know when he joined me on this cheery task but he just got on with it. Sweat dripped from his forehead and I could hear his breaths labouring behind the bandanna he wore.

"How long you been here?" I asked. He paused for a moment and dredged his shovel into the ground with a strong force.

"Hour or so." He rasped, throat dried from the manual labour and the crisp sun that sent rays down onto us. "Look, I still ain't sure bout ya but….thanks for today. You didn't have to." He ran his hand through his raggedy hair and nodded after pulling the shovel out the now unearthed ground.

"I did. How else am I going to get you guys to trust me, at least a little?" He scoffed and threw another pile of dirt over his broad shoulders.

"What you do before all this? That shootin' was impressive in there." He knew the answer, I could see in his eyes he just wanted to confirm his thoughts.

"Army." I dug deeper into the ground. He gave an accepting look and we got back to work and exchanged no more words. We collectively hauled the bodies that were wrapped in white cloth with some blood stains just breaching the surface into the ground. It felt all too familiar to me.


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the very late update. I had exams and I wanted to focus on that so now I will have time to write. **

I just kept digging and digging until rick made an appearance. I paid little attention to what him and Daryl were talking about. I had a job and I was going to do it even if later on I'd collapse into my sheets. Although I did hear Daryl saying to rick he earned his time off as leader. I guess everyone reaches their limits more so now. It was quiet everywhere apart from the gentle moaning from beyond the gates. Everyone was collecting their thoughts after the attack. It was then when that somber, morose tone changed at a click of a finger. I heard a wail coming from the fences. My head snapped round and there were walkers everywhere, each of their faces blurring into the next. A young woman screamed at rick and Daryl to run over. Rick took off like a bird but Daryl turned and nodded me on with them. It looked as if they could use anyone available now.

The rotting bodies piled up against the chain link fences and it began to bend inwards, towards us. I kept stabbing through the decaying skulls as others tried to hold it up with all their might. Dark, murky blood covered my sleeves and some splattered on my face, I deserved a shower after this ordeal for sure.

"BACK OFF!" Someone yelled so we did. Everyone heaved a breath taking in the situation.

"We got anything we can prop up against this, hold them off a bit?" I asked generally. Rick's head turned round to the farm I've seen him tending to. One structure stood out, one that had poles that would be strong enough to hold the walkers a bay for now. It was a rush to collect the poles, carefully untying the rope that bound them to each other. Once or twice I saw rick sigh forlorn at the destruction of his pea pods but we live in the moment and there was a greater need than a few greens.

"PUSH THEM UP AGAINST THE FENCE!" I finally saw who was dictating the orders out and it was Daryl. We all pushed the poles up against the fence and it seemed to be holding it up slightly more than before and we only needed some time to think of another solution. My eyes felt to the ground out of exhaustion but I noticed something peculiar on the ground. It fell out of place, fresh blood amongst the black blood. I followed its trail with my eyes and it led me to the rear end of two rats. Just the rear end. I gasped, what freak feeds walkers?

"Rats, there are rats. Someone has been feeding them rats." In my mind this was hard to comprehend. After all these monsters have done to loved ones, how many 'safe' places they've destroyed and how many lives ruined by them someone still feels as if they need to be fed but they're hunger is eternally growing. They fed off us, but it's not just the flesh and bones it's the fear, the fear of the end when we are not quite ready.

Everyone was shocked as their beady eyes looked at the half eaten rats. I could tell they were as confused as I was.

"Who'd do something like that?" The young woman, from before, said but was quickly interrupted by a leading Daryl.

"I don't know but we don't have time to think right now. We gotta deal with this." He said gesturing towards the walkers whom still persisted to collapse the fence. "We gotta draw them away."

"I've gotta idea." Rick said once again looking over at his flourishing farm with pigs, the pigs. He face grew sadder as he look at the pigs. I knew he was giving up a great deal today, this farming life he's had for however long but it had to be done. It all comes down to safety first because it's all well and good having food but if you're constantly being chased by walkers then food won't do you much good until you can take a breath and eat.

Daryl took flight to a pickup truck and rick coaxed his pigs into their death. Daryl drove the truck out the gates and towards the hoard.

"GO!" Daryl yelled at rick that took the message and grabbed the first unlucky victim. He paused for a brief moment as he held it in his hands but any feeling of remorse was shook away when walkers turned their heads to the new prey. He sliced the pig's leg open and it wailed and screamed as it was thrown to the ground. It was piercing to the ear but it was soon over when eight walkers surrounded it and began to feed. The truck moved a good distance away before the next pig was offered upon the walkers. Rick face was still and nothing showed he just did what he had to do and moved on. The walkers moved after the next and the next and then it was over. The truck drove back into the prison and a possible crisis was averted.

We all collectively sighed in relief, I sure as hell did. I walked along the dusty path back to the graves but I felt a sudden tap on my shoulder.

"Hey, you new? I haven't seen you round here." The pretty young woman spoke like silk was flowing from her mouth.

"Fairly I guess. Names Nat." I extended my hand to which she held and we shook jokingly. Her smile was beautiful and it glittered in the sunlight as well as her demeanour which was warm.

"Well, thanks for helping out, I'm Maggie. You met Glenn?" I nodded to her question but I didn't really know where she was heading with this. "Oh cool, he's my husband." Wow, he sure did well I mean damn.

"Oh, that's cool." I faked an adoring smile for the sugar sweet Maggie. She said bye and ran off no doubt to find her husband.

I was ready to just let the cold, refreshing water pour over me and wash away the troubles and grime. It felt good and I felt good for the first time in a while, even though my muscles ached. Nightmares had dissipated into thin air pretty much as soon as I got here and I could sleep, really sleep. I could almost say I was happy and I saw these people as my lifeline because if I was still out there grudging on through the muggy forest I know personally I would've ended it. These people gave me more than protection and peace of mind, they gave me a purpose.


	8. Chapter 8

The retching and cough, the sweat pouring down my forehead, everything blurred and shaking meant one thing Illness stank from every inch of my body.

"Hershel..." I coughed violently. "Hershel..." The old man hobbled my way into the cell which I'd been placed in until I got better.

"Nat, what's wrong?" He lulled.

"I need... Something cold... I'm burning..." Each pause was a heavy breath as I gasped for fresh air but all I got was muggy air.

"Okay." His icy skin was brought to my forehead and I saw him hide the concern with a smile as he went to find something to ease the heat. Like a bullet piercing my skin tiredness hit me and all I could do was sleep, sleep until I was better.

_We kept to the darkness and out of the spotlights. The enemy were bashing in doors left, right and centre. Pulling out sleepy families from their slumber. Shots were fired and I could hear the cries of mothers and fathers. I don't understand how you could live with yourself after killing a young boy or girl in front of their family. I had my back covered and we advanced forth, successfully until we reached the edge of the village. They surrounded it entirely. The enemy had lined up men from the village in a line. Torches lit them up like a fire. The enemy stood uneasy, shifting from foot to foot. From what I could see one received orders and waved the machine gunners off. The village men were no more. _

Although my eyes were clammed shut through exhaustion, I forced them open after reliving that again. I thought the nightmares had gone, obviously not. I did however feel considerably better health wise. The ache in my stomach had dissipated into thin air and the cough had ceased. A fever was still running it was nothing of concern however I would be off my feet for a bit, so no runs or anything. I'm sure there's other stuff to do around here. I laced my boots and stood shakily.

"Hershel!" I yelled, my door was locked and in front of me were walkers, what happened? Every second Hershel wasn't there the more nervous I got. "Hershel!" The walkers clawed out of their cell, obviously smelling the fresh meat that is me. I doubled over, spewing vomit all over my temporary cell. I still felt better, it might have just been the stench of rotting corpses that seemed to occupy the adjacent cells, well I hoped anyway. "Hershel!" I called once more and I was greeted by the comforting smile and I sighed with relief.

"Thank god, you're alive. You slept three days, and with all that was going on we thought you were..."

"I'm fine, still running a fever but nothing like before. I'll live." He smiled and unlocked my cell. He looked sadly over to the deceased members of the prison. I carefully placed my hand on his shoulder reassuringly.

"I'll do it, you've done enough." I grabbed my knife and it was over in seconds. I helped haul the bodies out onto the cart but Hershel sent me to rest so I leisurely sat outside enjoying the sun that had been absent to my skin. It felt so good. The warm rays were a new change to the dark dingy cell.

I just happily watched everyone go about their lives within in this prison, they called home. It was amazing what they did here. Most would turn people away but they're still taking in people. Just sat in the sun I saw three new people. This was for the long haul, not just a place to crash. This is how we rebuild society by little places like this, I'm sure they're others. Maybe we could connect and befriend them, maybe we could rebuild cities and go back to normal life, maybe it could work. Just maybe...

"RICK!"

No, no, no, no. This is not happening. This is good, I've finally got it good and they're going to ruin it. I have to fight but there's a tank and we can't defend against this, can we? This can't be happening, it has to be a nightmare. I had hope and it's been taken. This going to end well. It never does, this sort of thing has happened before and it'll end the same way it always does. Me alone. I watched as my previous groups have been pulled apart, gurgling on their own blood, suffering. I don't want these people to die, they're good people. I'm not but I always survive the massacre and they don't. Why do the good die and the twisted don't? The world is messed up. We will not be fine.

I stand up and walk up to some other congregated by the fence as they watch Rick go down to the man with the tank. As I get closer I see a familiar figure among the tank man's army. Hershel, but he's kneeling submissively awaiting his fate. Daryl begins to secretively hand out large guns to the crowd.

"We could use you right now" He whispered to me in a very hushed voice. I nod and he hands me a large rifle. He tells us our positions and we begin waiting, waiting for the worst.

It looked as if the negotiations went well. Rick seemed to want to compromise and he wanted them to stay here with us. I see no reason why it couldn't work. The prison is huge they wouldn't even see one another. It'd work, I understand why they'd want this place its safe with fences to keep the walkers out. You can provide for yourself. It'd be a hard adjustment but it would be worth it in the end. Hopefully this guy can see it, any rational person would.

The glint of something metallic catches my eye. My eyes focus and I see a sword drawn to Hershel's neck. Mentally I beg and beside me Maggie and her sister are blubbering for him not to. Everyone tenses and tightens the grip on their weapon. A flash of hope hits us collectively as he slowly draws the weapon away from his neck, I breathe a sigh of relief...

"NOOOOOOOOOOO DADDY!" Maggie screeches and fires her weapon in anguish.

Everything stops momentarily like in the field when the first shot is fired, then you snap to your senses and fire back. This is for Hershel. I fire my weapon with lethal accuracy. Three men drop stone cold dead. I satanically smirk to myself. All of a sudden the tank crushes the chain link fence beneath its caterpillar tracks. I just keep firing until my clip runs out. We scatter in different directions as the tank fires and destroys our home. I run off taking shelter behind a wall hoping I don't get shot. I've come so far, I can't die now. I peek cautiously round the side of the wall and I see a man and I shot him down. I see people run to the bus panicked and crying. Mothers hold their children to their chests tightly.

"GO, RUN! I'LL COVER YOU!" I desperately urge them to hurry on as I provided cover fire. Once I'm happy they've safely got on the bus I move onto the larger gathering of people, well three or four but before I can get to the, walkers near. They lumber over to take a bite and people panic and get shot by someone on the other side of the tank which fires at the prison.

"BOOM!" The sheer power of the explosion knocks me off my feet, onto the cold concrete. A fire is burning from the tank, someone destroyed the tank. How?

"Owww." I push myself of the floor and raise my gun to a dark figure hovering over me.

"Ey! It's me." The familiar southern drawl calmed me down. I felt relieved that there was another living soul.

"Oh sorry." I lowered my gun. Another explosion boomed sounding us to leave.

"We need to go." Daryl grunted.

"Yeah."

The prison had fallen. Everything good, gone. I just ruin everything, as soon as I come and it all falls to pieces. I'm a bad luck charm, I should just leave and save them the trouble.


	9. Chapter 9

My legs dragged against the ground, my head drooped. Daryl just ran, he didn't stop, didn't say anything. He just kept going as if it meant something, which it didn't. It must've been two hours at least until we stopped, exhausted, scared with no hope. We just collapsed on the floor gasping for a breath. We needed to get away from there, as far as we could. I wanted to break down and cry until the sun comes up but my eyes were dry and emotionless. Daryl was much the same.

"We need to move, find somewhere just for now." It was all so monotonous and repetitive. At the prison I could enjoy myself for once but now it's all coming back it's all the same as before. I feel I'm alone, I know I have Daryl but he's as if more broken than I am. Daryl grunted a response so we moved on.

"Here'll do." He rasped whilst smacking his clenched fist against the wall. Something clattered inside. It was a walker.

"I got it." I said holding my knife. It'd be nice to release of anger so I grabbed the bitch's hair, threw her to the ground and I stomped and stomped, kicked and kicked. I then used my knife and stabbed repeatedly as the murky blood splattered on my face. I know it was sick but I couldn't care less anymore.

"Come on." He stepped inside crossbow raised switching position every doorway he reached. No walker was left inside, I think he was disappointed he didn't get to brutally kill a walker like me.

The house was dusty, thick layers occupied every available surface. Downstairs was a large living room and huge kitchen my mother could of only dreamed of. Upstairs was one master bedroom and one kids bedroom. I prayed nothing lay dormant in the kid's room. Hadn't I been through enough?

"Where you sleeping?" I asked as I rummaged through the kitchen cupboards.

"Don't care." He just hammered away at the windows with a couple of plywood boards he found.

"We should stay in one room. It's safer and who knows what's in the kids one. I think we can agree both are not ready for that." He cocked his head and nodded slightly without a sound then left. I heard his boots against the wooden floor. It creaked like something awful. A door slammed and that was the last I saw of him for a few hours. I was alone and for once it felt okay. Daryl was hard work and I did most of the talking and it was exhausting. I understand though, his home and family torn away from him and now is stuck with me. I get it however I just hope this mood doesn't get us killed.

I felt numb I guess repressing all these destructive emotions helped with that. I didn't want to feel anything, I just wanted to be in an empty vacuum where no one could disturb me or hurt me and I could just be. I can dream. I realized all these bottled up emotions will all come flooding out at once so I know in the long run it isn't good for me but live in the moment right. I just need to keep myself occupied with jobs. Don't dwell on it and maybe drown my sorrows with a strong drink.

The office seemed a good idea to begin my search so I went in and began my search for hard liquor. Hopefully the man of the house liked to drink some good whiskey. Desk draws stood in my way so they were pulled open but despite my efforts it was no use. I tore apart the room in search for a liquid escape but there was nothing.

"ARGGHHH!" I screamed in anger as I threw a lamp at the wall. It shattered and I felt satisfied from the sound of the glass breaking into millions of pieces. Still pumped up I began tearing books off the shelves and launching them across the room against the walls. Book after book, chair after chair the room was a mess like me. My knees buckled no longer holding my weight. I sobbed uncontrollably but still I mentally scolded myself for being weak and crying. I couldn't stop it just went on and on. I was broken, too many times a good thing was taken from. Once too many.

Heavy boots clashed against the old wood. Daryl was moving about so I decided to investigate after that flop. I crept upstairs and entered the master bedroom. He sat on the edge of the bed, head in hands, defeated.

"Hey! You can't come in here. Knock at least bitch!" He spat his eyes just were pure rage which if I'm not careful I will be on the receiving end of.

"It's my room too dick." Not a wise move I'll admit but I'm not letting him act this way with me.

"What d'you wan'?" He grunted angrily.

"You want something to eat?" I said calmly and he nodded rubbing his hands over his face. His arms pushed him up slowly, surely aching from everything he done in the last 24 hours. We wordlessly moved to the kitchen however a mutual feeling was there. I understood it loud and clear.

Tinned peaches, I was sick of the things but my stomach growled so the beasts within had to be fed before it roared. I handed Daryl another tinned can product which he swiftly opened and devoured in a matter of minutes. He left and returned no doubt back to bed with his head in his hands. I thought I'd do something more productive with my time like find an alcoholic beverage.

"I'm going out! I'll be back soon." I called out to Daryl who probably heard but didn't respond. He needed rest.

Our house was behind me as I enter the next one along. Pretty much the same layout as our one but no walkers hid inside. Firstly I searched the kitchen. Each cupboard proved useless apart from the odd one which offered canned goods but other than that useless to me. I carried on my search throughout the house. Next I tried the office as I did in our house but it look too modern to hold any liquor so I left that one in peace along with the house. The search there was fruitless.

The next two houses were the same unfortunately and it was getting dark. Determined to find alcohol I decided one more house would be fine. I can handle myself just okay without help, I've had to time after time. Anyway I punched the wall and waited for a tumbling response. I heard two crashed within the house and I awaited the monsters to show their ugly faces. As I thought two stumbled out gnashing and gnawing for their next meal. I grabbed the first walker's collar and kept it a distance, then pushed it into the second which tumbled to the ground. I stabbed the first one in the head and threw it aside like junk. Then I swiftly dealt with the second, who was still trying to push itself up.

Once again I searched the kitchen and the office but nothing showed up unfortunately. Stepping out into the back garden for a breath of air I saw a shed. The shed looked promising because it wasn't a rickety one, it looked as if someone spent a lot of time in it. I swung open the door and there was what I wanted, a strong ass drink. This guy was making moonshine. Thank you mystery guy. I grabbed a few jars and I went back home. As I walked back in the dark I felt a little spark of happiness inside me. I guess distracting myself really helps. I felt kind of good and I was even going to offer some to Daryl.

"I'm back!" I hollered but as soon as I did I heard footsteps quicken. Daryl was sooner enough right in my face enraged by something.

"Where the hell were you?!" He growled lowly sending shivers through my core.

"Out. I'm back ain't I?" I snapped.

"You could've been killed." He countered.

"Yeah, but I wasn't."

"You ain't going out again alone."

"What! You can't decide that. I can handle myself perfectly fine. Anyway I got us some food and drink." I howled fiercely, he just shook his head and began to walk off back to the room.

"You know what Daryl, I understand, I understand the pain but please don't take it out on me." He stopped and cocked his head so I was just in the corner of his eye.

"You don't get it." He growled and he quickly scampered off. I felt kinda bad for the guy, he lost everything but now I was going to lose my wits with a mind numbing drink I think.

I sat in the once bright and airy living in a sinking old sofa. I made an impression in the chair and pulled out my jar of moonshine. I removed the cap and took a sip. I coughed briefly as it burnt my throat. After a couple of sips I adapted to it being very strong. I began to chug it down glug after glug. My mind became fuzzy and unclear on what the hell I was doing. I drank another half of a jar and I thought best to go upstairs. I stumbled and tripped often on my journey to the room and I must've made a racket. The walls were my best friends being there for me when I was about to tumble and holding me. Or if I did fall the floor would catch me before I went any further. Doors just stood in the way from where I wanted to go so I banged my fist against them hoping it'd open.

"Let me in!" I moaned against the door. If I wasn't in a drunken haze I would have known the door doesn't lock however I was extremely drunk and I must've forgotten. I banged my fists harder against the door until I heard someone move around in the room.

The door opened a crack and Daryl's face looked me up and down disapprovingly. I stumbled in ungracefully and pushed Daryl aside then collapsed on the bed.

"Everything is spinning, make it stop. ARRRGGGHH!" I wailed helplessly with my arms and legs flailing around.

"Are you drunk?" He said calmly at first.

"What do you think asshole?" I snapped still I slurred my words, to be honest it verbal vomit.

"That's why you went out, to get a drink?" He wasn't calm anymore just frustrated and disappointed it seemed.

"Yeah, I wanted a drink. So what? It's not a big problem, I wanted to forget today, that's all." I grumbled. Clumsily I pushed myself up so I was sitting at the edge of the bed.

"You got any left?" I nodded and threw him a jar. "Thanks." He took a large swig from the jar and relished the taste of the moonshine. I don't think he heard of pacing himself because the majority of the moonshine had gone in seconds it seemed. By God he needed it though.

Daryl finally admitted. "Everything is shit. I ain't never gunna see my group again. No one, they're all dead." He just look down defeated, it was like he was throwing his hands up and saying this is it.

"Yeah it is bad, at the moment but it'll get better. And our people are strong they ain't dead." I tried even if the words didn't stand true to myself things for Daryl would get better. In the short time span I've known him he's a natural born survivor, he was made for this.

"Pfft, like hell they'll will. You don't get it." He spat cruelly. Stumbling to stand he stood intimidatingly over me. Not liking the way Daryl tried to intimidate me I stood up but I didn't match his height or stature. I thrust my finger in his face and began to speak.

"I don't get it huh? No just staying with many groups and slowly beginning to trust and like the people only for them to be torn away from me again and again. Time after time I've lost everyone and end up alone. I'd spend months just walking, to nowhere. I was basically a walker but finding the prison and seeing how strong you guys were filled me with faith and hope for the future. Once again it's gone but I have one person, you. And I don't care if you don't like me but as long as we stay together I won't be truly alone, like every time before." I almost began to yell at him with tears brimming my eyes. I was enraged by the way he thought he was the only one that went through this, he wasn't the only one who's been through this. Daryl just hung his head then took another swig of his moonshine then tossed it aside.

"You don't get it. Everybody we know is dead, and we ain't never going to see them again." He yelled, practically throwing it in my face.

"How do you know that?" I opposed quietly, praying he'd believe me.

"NO! Maybe if I stopped looking, maybe if I didn't give up." I tried to reach for his arm but he pulled it away and whimpered. I soon realized I should just let him get it out of his system and confess what he thought he did wrong even though he didn't.

"And Hershel...maybe I coulda done somethin', that's on me." His voice then began to break at the end of each sentence. Daryl then did something I never thought I'd see, cry. He began choking on his tears that rolled freely down his face. His head dropped like his soul. He was broken into two and he was disintegrating with ever tear that fell. I did what any person would do in this situation which was to hug him. I held him up tightly from the back to keep him from crumbling downwards. He was now my responsibility and I do care about him a lot so now I've been given a chance do something right. Keep this man alive. I whispered gently "it's not your fault.' Over and over again I hoped that sentence would get through his thick skull. In reality it wasn't his fault, he fought hard for the prison and his family. He did them proud, it's just sad he can't see what he did for them and even if they were dead they would've be proud of him.

We sat there for a while not doing anything, I wasn't hugging him anymore I sensed him getting uncomfortable beneath my embrace. We just sat closely in silence yet I felt I connected with him in a deeper manner. We understood one another as if old friends yet we've only known each other for a short amount of time. We weren't thinking, we weren't doing anything and I know it sounds awkward and weird but it wasn't we were just numb beyond belief so sitting there in another's company but not having to say anything was what we both needed at that moment. After a while I span round and pulled myself into the covers of the bed. I rested my head on the pillow along my thoughts.

"Don't stay up too late. Night Daryl." I said quietly as my eyes shut tight once more.


	10. Chapter 10

_Dragged against the floor as my legs were scraping on the cold concrete. A sack cover my face and all I could see were fuzzy figures that held my arms and yanked them to the direction they were going. My health was no concern I'd trained to withstand great deals of pain but where was he? Had they got him too? Handcuffs locked round my hands and I was harshly shoved to the ground. Swiftly the sack was ripped from my face and replaced with a blaring light. My eyes watered at the intensity of the light and I heard cackles from beyond the darkness. _

_The shirt on my back was torn off and tossed aside, which left me bare and vulnerable to their will._

_"Tell me where are the rest of you." The man spoke calmly. I just kneeled silently until I felt a whip crack against my back then I wailed in pain. My flesh gashed open leaving blood to flood down. Time after time they whipped at my back yet I would still not give an answer. Then they began burning my flesh, cutting my skin and electrocuting my body but I wouldn't give in, I couldn't give in. _

"ARGHH, AHHHHHH!" I screeched "NO, NO, NO, NO!" I wailed. Daryl shook awake at the noise I was creating. "STOP, NO, STOP, STOP!" I couldn't stop screaming, every feeling I had then came flooding back, every last one. Daryl's hand crashed down on my mouth hoping I'd cease to scream. I squirmed under his grasp as he whispered 'calm down, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you." The screaming stopped but the crying began.

"They tortured me, I haves scars all over of where they tortured me." Daryl looked confused and angry at this deranged mumbling.

"Who?" He growled lowly as if he was about to tear off the head of whoever committed the crime.

"The enemy, they tortured me when I didn't give them the information. I had to withstand it, I had to for them." I curled up into a sobbing ball, even though on the outside I was stone cold and strong, on the inside it was crumbling and begging for it to stop when it happened. I think Daryl by this point understood the gist of what I was talking about but he sat and listened to me mumble away like someone in an insane asylum. I told him about what they did to me and his face screwed up angry and frustrated that he couldn't do anything. I knew the sort of person Daryl was, all he wanted to do was protect those closest to him and when something goes wrong he blames himself. This time he couldn't blame himself, this was in the past and had happened way before I met him yet his anger still seemed to be directed at the men that did it and at himself. I finally came around from my deranged state and I was exhausted. It felt as if something had been ripped out of me. I looked around and my scenery changed from the bedroom to the lounge.

"You okay?" Daryl asked to which I replied yeah sleepily.

"Why am I down here?" I yawned.

"You fainted so I thought I should keep an eye on yer and I wanted something to eat." I nodded understandingly yet I was confused on why I fainted, maybe I was just so hyped my body just stopped to calm me down.

"You want something to eat?" He said as he walked into the kitchen because he already knew the answer. He brought out a can of peas, I wasn't going to say I hated peas so instead I just thanked him and ate them to fill the hole in my stomach. As I scoffed the peas down Daryl shifted around like he wanted to say something. My eyes levelled with his and locked.

"I think we need to move find somewhere a bit more permanent, where I can hunt and stuff." He said whilst fiddling with his bolts but I didn't feel as if that was what he wanted to say.

"I don't see why not. You're the survivor expert." I smirked sweetly. He flicked up the corner of his lips.

"Well I try my best." We both laughed a little then went on to pack our things up.

"Got everything?" I said holding a large backpack I found in the garage.

"Hmmhh." Daryl grunted while chewing his nail. Planning for the worst case scenario we packed food and water in both of our bags if we get separated. Just before leaving we checked a map and decided to head in the direction of a small town that was bordered with a fruitful forest. The journey wouldn't take too long maybe a day or two if we were slow so on the way we marked places we could stop and a place to meet if separated. We planned well but still I knew you can't plan for everything and even if you do it doesn't always go the way you want it to.

"I've never used a crossbow before." I said making conversation an hour into our journey. Daryl looked over and considered something in that complex mind of his.

"Now as gooda time as any." He handed me the heavy crossbow. It was a fine piece, everything was expertly crafted and tuned to perfection.

"Seriously?" Nodding he urged me on. "What do I do? I mean I've never used one before, can you show me or something." He just rolled his eyes and smiled. It was nice to see him smile even if a little.

"Hol' it up and look down 'ere. Aim and pull the trigger 'ere." He directed rather bluntly but they were simple and easy instructions to follow. Hold it up, look down, aim and...

"No, up more." He surrounded me with his arms and held up the crossbow higher than before.

"Okay aim." He still held it whilst I moved it tiny amount to hit this tree. "Okay fire." He murmured in my ear. The bolt zoomed off at an extremely fast speed before my very eyes and hit the center of the tree.

"That was awesome," I span my head round beaming at Daryl who was smirking as well. "I might keep it." I joked.

"Unless you want to cause harm to yerself go ahead." He so said deadpan I thought he was serious.

"Seriously." He twisted his head round and smirked mischievously. "Asshole." I muttered.

"Here, there's a walker round here. Good for you to get some practice." He handed the crossbow back to me. Through the bushes I saw a walker gnawing away at a fallen deer.

"Go on." He whispered and pushed me forward a little to which I withered a glare at him for.

Slowly I advanced forward towards the walkers that hadn't taken a notice of me yet. One foot in front of the other slowly... "Argghhh, my foot!" The walker now took notice of me and turned round snarling at the fresh meat. Daryl went on alert mode and sprinted towards me. He snatched the crossbow from my grasp as I lay helpless on the floor with my foot caught in a trap. So much strength went into smashing the walkers head into pieces. After the walker had been finished by Daryl he dove by my side and looked over my foot.

"Does it hurt bad?" He said as he moved my foot gently. By me wincing he got the message. "Come on, let's get outta here." Daryl got my foot out of the trap and he held me up by the waist. We hobbled away to somewhere safer than here.

"Ow, ow, ow." I winced at the pain that shot through my foot. "Wait, wait, wait." Daryl stopped in his tracks. "Can we just wait a minute please?"

"Okay," he sighed, then he proceeded to move his crossbow to his front. Next he crouched down slightly and extended his hands behind him. "Get on."

"Are you serious?" I asked dazed by the gesture.

"Yeah this is a serious piggyback, get on." I decided not to argue further so I hopped on his back. This was the first time in a while I was given a piggyback, it was kinda weird but cool at the same time. I enjoyed it but I'm not embarrassed by it. My arms laced round his neck as his hands held my legs up as we entered the graveyard.

"Do you think anyone is in there?" i asked idly.

"If there is i'll deal with them." He said seriously

"i can shoot Daryl."

The funeral home was spotless, not a speck of dust lay on any of the surfaces. It felt spacious and airy. Light entered freely causing the room to brighten up. Someone must've lived here recently. Collectively we searched the funeral home and nothing moved and it was awfully quiet, the quiet before the storm. Daryl led me downstairs to a basement in the hope of finding bandages to wrap my foot. The sight before me took me aback. It looked as if someone had given walkers a funeral. Their faces were smoothed with special makeup and their attire was formal. To me I thought it was kind of beautifully weird. They still believed they deserved a sending off the right way. Not many people are like that anymore and I'll be the first to admit that I don't see walkers as the people they once were because if you do you'll carry so much guilt on your shoulder it'd destroy you.

"Someone ran outta dogs to dress up." Daryl joked while rummaging through the metallic cupboards.

"No, they just saw the walkers as the people they once were. I guess it was their way of coping." I said solemnly whilst intently looking at the faces of the dead men. Daryl went very quiet as he tried to understand what I said.

"Here." He tugged at my shoulder then began to wrap my foot in a bandage.

"Thanks." Something came over me but I couldn't determine whether it was a shadow or a light. Seeing this place and seeing what this person has done for people who can't even thank him changed my perspective on some things. One question rushed round my mind like a race car. Are there good people anymore?

We walked into the kitchen and opened the cupboards expecting little more than cobwebs and dust bunnies, instead it was packed with jars and jars of food and bottles of coke.

"Woah..." I exclaimed.

"That's a white trash lunch righ' 'ere."

"Yeah…" I stopped briefly before realising "This someone's stash, we can't take this." I began as Daryl considered it carefully.

"Okay, we take some of this but not all, okay?" He compromised.

"Okay." Without warning Daryl began stuffing his face with peanut butter jelly and grunting weird noises as he did.

"Ewwwww, do you have manners?" I smacked his arm playfully and he chuckled at my disgusted face.

After that we got our stuff and lay it in the opposing room, well when I say we I mean Daryl as he wouldn't let me due to my foot.

"Go faster." He encouraged

"I can't dar…." On the spur of the moment my legs swung in the air as he lifted me up and carried me the rest of the way into the kitchen. I was almost in a fit of laughter as he carried me in and sat me on the chair opposite his. Both of us were eager to dig into the feast that lay before us. Pigs feet, coca cola, peanut butter and jelly, everything but the pigs feet excited me. Finally a delicious treat for us. Everything was upbeat and happy. We were genuinely enjoying ourselves as we began to tuck into our food.

"BAMM!" Something clattered from outside no doubt a walker as it always is ruining a nice moment. Daryl jumped from his chair but snapped at me for trying to go along with him. I stood patiently waiting for his return.

"It's just a damn dog." I sighed in relief and hobbled over to see the dog. Strangely I was excited to see a living dog as all I've seen are rotting corpses or none at all. Hobbling over I heard the door slam shut.

"It gone?" I sighed, Daryl nodded but picked up on my disappointed tone.

"It might come back." He offered.

"Yeah I hope so, I love dogs. They're just awesome." He chuckled lightly and agreed with me. For a while we just scoffed as much food as we could before throwing up. It was some of the best food I have had in a while, the most tempting. Daryl even got me to try a pig's foot and it wasn't as bad as I previously thought. At least I got some protein in me.

Joy, was a foreign word to me however now I feel it tingling through my body when I'm around Daryl and we are just messing around and joking with each other. It felt as if my brain was quenching the feeling and now I had felt it once again it felt normal. Normal that was still strange, nothing will be the old normal anymore I've already accepted that. Maybe this was normal now, death and despair. This person though giving these people a funeral even though they couldn't thank him that was normal. It gives me hope for the future that we can create our own normal, a nice normal like this guy. I could only hope Daryl felt the same way.

"Do you think there's still good people Daryl?" I asked in the now dimly lit room. We just had a few candles to supply light. Shadows occupied our faces but the light sparked our eyes.

"Idunno." He shrugged trying get out of this topic of conversation.

"Come on, do you really think idunno?" I imitated him which caused him to shyly look downwards at his feet.

"Well do you?" he countered.

"You know what yeah. After being here and seeing what this person did, I do. I didn't before I just thought this world was full of assholes not anymore." I said fairly contently. Daryl went into thought of question I asked.

"I guess…" He finally replied.

"What changed your mind?" I pressed.

"You know." He shrugged trying to get the focus off him.

"Daryl…" Our eyes locked once more but his gaze was deep and full of emotion. My brain went into overdrive trying decipher his code then hit, it hit hard within my stomach which knotted and I nearly doubled over.

"Daryl, I'm not…" I breathed. My eyes watered at the thought of me being a good person but I had left too many people for my gain, I've stole too much from the people who needed it and I've corrupted too many good people with my views. Just because I think there may still be good people left doesn't mean I'm one of them.

Another knock at the door and I suspected it was the dog again as did Daryl who held a pigs foot in his hand ready to give to it. I wanted the dog to come in and be our pet. That'd be awesome, probably far fetched but even still. We could train it and stuff.

"NAT! NAT!" Daryl bellowed at the top of his lungs. I didn't think it was the dog so I grabbed his crossbow which he foolishly left. I hobbled as fast as I could go. I reached the doorway holding his crossbow and his body was pressed hard against the door trying to hold the numerous walkers back that wanted to breach our little paradise. He indicated he needed his crossbow and I threw it over.

"GO! GO!" He howled like wolf. His face was strained but fierce, these walkers were going to pay.

"I can't leave you." I wailed, once again tears brimmed my eyes, I knew I wasn't strong enough to go alone again. His eyes were desperate for me to go but suddenly he span round allowing walkers the through. Crossbow raised he shot one down. The others clumsily pushed through knocking one another down to the ground.

"GET YOUR SHIT, GO OUT THE WINDOW AND I'LL MEET YOU AT THE ROAD!" He roared and all I could do was listen, he'd hate me if I didn't. I hurried through the winding corridors to grab my things. I could hear the commotion downstairs, I prayed Daryl was okay but then I remembered he's a natural born survivor however everyone's luck run's out eventually doesn't it? I couldn't think about this now, I just had to get out and meet him by the road, he will be there.

The road was quiet no walkers were drawn here, it was just nothingness. Anxiously I waited and waited. I couldn't yell his name, my mouth went dry. He had to be okay. Every passing minute brought more and more anxiety to my mind. It felt as if it physically hurt, my hands trembled my foot tapped furiously against the dirt and I constantly was scanning the graveyard for a living figure. Then the pacing began, up and down, around the trees. I couldn't stop these nerves. I wanted to scream and scream but that was stupid and crazy. There on the tree line a figure coming towards me.

"Daryl?" I whispered. "Daryl?" I called out again. My knife was held tightly in my hands which sweated excessively.

"Grrrrrrrrr..." the figure growled as it walked into the moonlight. My heart dropped for a second but as the walkers features became clearer it wasn't who I thought it was. With a wave of relief that over come me I stabbed the poor bastard in the head to end it'd miserable existence.

"NAT! NAT!" Someone called me from afar. My head snapped around to see the man I was waiting for. My legs couldn't have carried me any faster than they did. Tears streamed down my face and I just told that voice in my head calling me weak and whiny to shut up because I really didn't care. All nerves and anxieties were gone within a second of seeing his face. I launched myself into him while he cautiously wrapped his arms around my much smaller frame as I sobbed uncontrollably.

"I thought, you were gone…" I blubbered.

"I ain't leaving you Nat." He confirmed as I still held tightly to his torso surely making his shirt damp with my salty tears.

"Thank you." I muttered under my breath. He couldn't have said anything better than that. I knew now I could be stronger than before with someone fighting my corner too, I have someone to protect and I will do just that. And now it was time to leave again another home gone. Along the road we traveled miles and miles until our sweat hit the ground along with our bodies. We gasped for air as we had run/hobbled quickly through the night to get to somewhere which had still not found. My lungs burnt like a raging fire and my limbs wanted to crumble like rubble. I needed a break from all this.

"Well looky here." _Oh shit._


End file.
